MURPHY’S LAW: Monday Scattershots.

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Amar’e Stoudemire just punched something on his way to the locker room. That never ends well. Stoudemire needs stitches. The Knicks need CPR.

I love watching Rajon Rondo play. I want to believe his story that momentum carried him into the official, but it didn’t. Yes, he was tripped. No, that’s not why he bumped the official. Rondo’s fortunate he’s only out one game. So am I. I’m going to the Hawks-Celtics game at the Garden Friday night. Rondo returns for that one.

Jeremy Hellickson won rookie of the year last year. He’s even better this year. Hellickson is fun to watch, partly because he’s like a machine out there. He changes pitches more than facial expressions.

Hellickson from Hoover, Dan Jennings Valley. The CIML added another alum to The Show Monday when Jennings made his MLB debut for the Miami Marlins. I had to double-check it was the Majors when I saw Jennings’ bright orange jersey, but that’s the way the new Marlins dress. Jennings and Hellickson were both all but un-hittable in high school.

As first reported by our friends at the Register, Portsmouth, NH lost Monday. That means Martensdale- St. Mary’s needs three wins when the baseball season starts to take back the record at 90 straight. Count on the Blue Devils doing that. And more.

According to CNBC, the NFL team that moved the fewest tickets after the NFL draft was the Vikings. I guess Matt Kalil just didn’t fire up purple nation.

Drake added a good basketball player Monday. Chris Hines averaged 10 points at Utah. Since he’s about to graduate, Hines can play right away. It’s the Russell Wilson loophole. Hey, anytime a major college (men’s) basketball or football player actually earns a degree, I’m all for rewarding them.

The book I’m reading, Drop Dead Healthy, says one should never read on the toilet. It’s terrible for you, and promotes hemorrhoids. I’m a guy. I’ll need a seven step program.